today was a hard day.
i left madeline at home
with auntie deb
(for just a few hours)
while i went with grandpa tom l.
to buy madeline a few things.
i didn’t think
it would be that difficult
to be away from her.
it didn’t help that shopping
was liz’s favorite thing
(and one of my least favorites).
we went to buy
a dresser
(or 6)
for madeline’s clothing.
i bought her
1 dresser
(it should fit a small % of her clothing)
and
an awesome stroller.
we returned home soon after…
and had
another video conference
with the goodman family in
the mn.
well over 30
family members
(some estimates put the crowd at 50+)
joined
to watch madeline
get a
diaper change,
bottle,
and a
burp.
(fascinating stuff, i know).
after all that
excitement
we decided
to take madeline
on her first
walk around the neighborhood.
she loved it.
then we took some photos
in the front yard.
she was
quite photogenic
in the outfit from grandma broccoli.
(an all-white outfit, i might add).
later on we got
a few visitors.
and a lot more food.
the food helps,
but i’m still down
23 pounds
since 3/25.
(i am, however, eating much healthier. liz would be proud).
now it’s time
for a 1-hour nap
before madeline’s ready
for her 2:00am
diaper change,
bottle,
and burp.
anyone up for a late-night
video conference?
9 Comments
Matt, I am still praying for you as you go through this difficult time, but i know when you look into your daughter eyes, there is so much joy….
I would love to offer you a session if you like. you let me know. the pictures on your blog are beautiful……
gina@ginaleephoto.com
~God bless
Matt, the sunglasses are the BEST and the white wings from your mom…so great! Congratulations on your first night. Thinking of you as you march through the hard moments.
What a diva in the sunglasses, but sweet as ever. Most dads would have forgotten the sunglasses, but there you are- never missing a beat (what you are missing is a little bit of weight). At the first few baby visits I always talk to parents about taking care of themselves too. Don’t forget that you need to take some time for yourself, and I know you have a list of people clamoring to watch Maddie when needed. Liz knew what a great dad you were going to be, but I am sure that she is still so proud at how good you are.
Hi Matt-I heard about you from the Preemie Parent group at Huntington. You don’t know me, but we have preemies in common. Mine is now 13 and almost 6 feet tall-where Madeline will be in the blink of an eye! You are truly an inspiration to not only your daughter and your family and friends, but to all of us who are following your amazing blog. The loss of your darling Liz is seemingly insurmountable, yet you are facing this challenge head on and with strength and humor. Please print out your wonderful musings for Madeline. I lost my mom at an early age, and I only wish I had someone as amazing as you writing about my early life and my mom. I know Liz is with you and the baby, and it seems you have a tremendous support system. Know that you have others pulling for you who you may never meet, but who admire you just the same. Madeline has the best daddy ever–don’t ever question yourself!
Dear Matt,
My husband Jack and I have known Carol and Alan Bensman for a very long time, and now that lovely relationship links us back to you. I have read every word that you have written. Just as vivid as your grief is the strength with which you meet it. Just as vivid as your grief is the joy and comfort that comes as you cradle your daughter. Please keep writing with such beauty and honesty about Madeline and her mother. One day, when the time is right, you will give those words to Madeline. They will be a very great gift.
With our love and prayers, Ann Daly Goodwin
Dear Matt,
Our daughter, Jessica, shared the tragic circumstances of your loss. You, precious Madeline, and your family are in our prayers each day. I took the liberty of sharing with others who are also praying “without ceasing”, and will continue to do so. There are no words to express the magnitude of your loss, but we hope that simply knowing that others are lifting you up in prayer each day will be of some comfort to you, and over time might ease some of the pain you must be feeling. Madeline is beautiful.
Sincerely,
Debbie and Rob Sutherland
Matt,
I am so very sorry for your loss, and I cannot imagine the pain you must feel. The only thing that must help is looking into your beautiful daughter’s eyes and seeing your wife.
I will keep you and Madeline in my prayers.
Lisa
I’m sorry Matt…but I’m so happy for you at the same time. I guess you probably feel the same. Sorry to loose Liz, overjoyed you have Madeline.
*hugs*
I love that picture of you and your little angel. you look like you have doubt ( at that moment in time)…..Little did the world know then….. “it takes a village”