as grandma candee once said,
“madeline’s going to have 52 birthdays this year!”
this week
marks birthday #3.
it was a special day.
there were visitors
in the
morning,
afternoon,
and
evening.
a few folks from yahoo!
in the morning.
followed by
an afternoon with
adam and katie
who
brought lunch,
gifts
and their child
(madeline’s first boyfriend?).
steph joined us.
we all talked
life with kids.
we laughed
and
i learned some stuff.
then
i cut lunch short
to run to the dr.
(this time for me).
i also went to the post office
to mail my taxes
(of course liz had them done by feb 1st…i just got around to mailing them today).
i got a talking to
from one of the mail clerks
for letting a lady
cut in front of me
to ask a question.
she told me,
“people never have just a question…”
“she took advantage of you.”
i said,
“i was just trying to be nice.”
she said,
“working here has made me a cynic.”
i said,
“i was a cynic until 3 weeks ago.”
she said,
“what happened 3 weeks ago?”
i told her.
she cried
and said,
“i’m no longer a cynic.”
(she’s gone, but liz is still changing people’s lives).
now wait…where was madeline?
during my
motivational speaking tour?
at home
with grandpa tom l.
when i got home,
we took madeline
for a ride in her
fancy stroller.
she fell asleep
to prepare for the
the evening visitors.
diane came by
and pacified madeline
mel showed up
with food cooked by another yahoo!
and bob and anna
brought a tres leches cake.
to celebrate birthday #3.
a three milk cake
is the kind of cake
all babies should eat
(if only they could).
we had one more visitor
who helped me
with some stuff.
a good night was
had by all
(especially madeline).
13 Comments
Matt, I heard about you on Sunday at church, where I met AJ and Sonya. My thoughts are with you. I’m so glad that AJ is on his way out there to be with you, and that your gorgeous baby has such a wonderful, loving father.
Sounds like a great day, but very busy! Happy three-week birthday to Madeline!
Yea! Happy Birthday #3 Madeline!
Hey Matt!!! What do my wondering eyes behold? Is Madeline wearing the same outfit in two (count them; TWO) pictures? Perhaps you’re getting the hang of this!
Just wanted to say “hi” to you and Madeline… let you know that we’ve been reading, crying, praying, wondering, checking, laughing, crying (did I mention that one?) and thinking that a book should be in your future. God Bless you, little Miss Madeline (Happy 3 Week Birthday Dear One!) and of course Lovely Liz; who is never far from our thoughts or prayers these days.
Keep up the good work! There are a whole lot of people pulling for you! We’ll see you later this month.
Hugs and kisses; Carolyn and the Kranz Clan; Brian, Dalton and Aaron
You are right, Liz is still changing lives…….I have changed the way I feel about almost everything since finding out what has happened to you. Kate (my daughter) told me last night that I have mellowed. Every moment counts, I told her, be the best person you can in every moment, you never know when your number will be up. I reminded her that we were all made in God’s image (and I’m not necessarily a religious person, just spiritual) and that means that God lives in all of us. I think that kind of freaked her out (she’s 17) and she started feeling guilty about something she had done to a friend. She tried to make excuses for her behavior and I reminded her that having a conscience was a good thing and was God’s reminder that you need to always do the right thing, no excuses! Anyway, thanks for sharing your post office story. Keep up the awesome job of raising your beautiful Madeline! I never knew my real dad but I was super lucky to have the dad that raised me. He was AWESOME……so are you! My best memories are of the days when my Dad was raising my sister Julie and I on his own. We were little and those were the best of times! Hope to see you someday again and meet Maddie!
Matt, congratulations on a milestone and Happy Birthday 3-week birthday to little Madeline! She is just beautiful and you are an inspiration to all those around you. I pray for you both every night. My prayer is simple and goes something like this:
“Dear God, please take care of Matt and Madeline and let them know they are not alone”
Lots of love,
Jessica
Matt – like others I found your blog through Cribsheet, and you and your family has been on my mind ever since. I am so so sorry that your wife, Liz, died. I’m sorry that the happiest and saddest events of your life have to be intertwined in this manner.
The business of grief is overwhelming. I’ve had a significant loss this year as well, and while I don’t have magic words to make you feel better, I can say that you will feel better, little by little. You will learn to enjoy the good days, and get through the bad days. You will learn when you need to reach out for support, and when you have to just get through the tough times on your own. This is your grief, and only you can decide how to work through it.
Madeline is so lucky to have you for a father. Just from what I’ve read, it is clear you will make sure she knows what a wonderful and beautiful person her mother, Liz, was. Your road is not easy, but you will be ok. Good luck.
I’m another stranger who found her way to your story and am changed from the experience. I just had a baby 3 months ago. Was feeling overtired. Complaining or stressing all the time. Hearing what happened to Liz broke my heart. It also cleared my head to appreciate life. I agree with you – she is still inspiring people. Thank you for sharing.
I picked up the Star Tribune this morning and could not get through more than a few lines without breaking down in tears for what seems like the millionth time. Only eight hours after giving birth to our first son on January 18th 2008, my wife passed away after her uterus would not contract, causing her to bleed out. It was supposed to be such a wonderful day, but it turned out to be the worst day of my life. Not a day goes by where I don’t look to the sky and cry out, WHAT AM I GOING TO DO NOW!!! I feel so alone and our house is so empty. I am fortunate to have a wonderful family who is so supportive and loving. Our Son is so beautiful and is the only reason it seems to get up in the morning. My wife was perfect in every way. We had been married since 2004 and I am so greatful for each day we spent together. How do you replace that? If you could be so kind as to respond, I think I need someone to talk to who can relate.
Robert Calcagno
I am sure you will receive a deluge of emails in response to the StarTribune article. Your pictures and music are so full of vitality in the wake of your loss. I personally have discovered that in the face of such an inconceiveable loss, gravity is not enough to keep you on the earth but holding tightly to the hand of your child is. Be prepared to be visited in your dreams by Liz. The dream will be vivid, the kind that feels like it really happened. You will recognize it because you will remember it better than regular dreams. She will be telling you she is ok and that she is fine in a possibly indirect way. Understand it and believe it. Your experience in the shower I experienced also. Water, in all its forms, has taken on deep meaning for me. I wish you the love of your little girl always. It will heal you when nothing else can. I am so grateful to you for sharing your story. Bless you and yours.
Dearest Matt,
Thank you for sharing your story. I am so sorry for your loss of your dear Elizabeth ( I Love that name it is my young daughters middle name too!). I see in the paper today. When I read “When he walks into a bank, a conversation with a clerk leaves them both in tears. I’m really sick of crying (and I feel bad that I ruin everyone’s day).” I think you where wrong Not only your not ruining anyones day but you are helping people see what they have and be happier about what they have.
The main reason I wanted to contact you is to let you know I understand. W went threw something very very bad when my son was a baby and I was very much alone. (he is almost 13 now) Well that something almost made me not want to go on but with that wonderful child in my life I had to. My son in a way saved my life and as much as he needed me I needed him too. And we are both stronger people cause of it all. Matt you are very strong and in my prayers! God bless your wonderful lil girl too. Congrats!
Sarah
Litchfield MN
dear, matt
im justin brown. i experienced something similar, but it didnt hit me as hard. It should never happen, but everything happens for a reason. To make you a stronger person, and to go threw life the way life is live. Just remeber, your going threw a hard time in life, but theirs always somebody out their thats going threw a harder time. Best wishes to you, and you have been an ifluence to our family. You will be with your wife one day. Godbless you.
Justin Brown (14)
St. Louis Park MN
matt
i too lost my partner in a shocking accident this month exactly 10 years ago. i thought i would never get over the grief or never be in love again. we did not have a child and so i felt the loss even more. god bless you. my only words of comfort would be that you can look for her in your heart and all around you. there is no such thing as death. and the pain will eventually become bearable and you can use this tragedy to grow spiritually and so meet your loved one on a different plane it is true. matt 10 years later i have finally met another wonderful man (i am 43) and i’m pregnant with my first child after 2 miscarriages. god bless you good luck.