Comments on: feb. 26 – mar. 6.

By: last week. – matt, liz and madeline

last week. – matt, liz and madeline — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 14:42:56 +0000

[...] road trip. [...]

By: Meghan

Meghan — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 20:29:03 +0000

Matt, I didn’t read through all the comments, but I just had to give eyedrops for pinkeye on my own to my one year old. This trick from my mom helped a lot. I wrapped him in a towel with his arms pinned to his sides. This kept him from rolling around, and I just had to keep his head still. For the antibiotics, I mix with some baby yogurt, and he is none the wiser. Good luck!

By: Danna

Danna — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 05:35:04 +0000

I just started reading your blog tonight.. I completely understand about not being able to hand them off. I am a single mother to 2 daughters and have had many of those nights!!! But it’s all worth it in the end!!
As for the medicine, my youngest daughter is 20 months, and to get her to take medicine, I put my knees on either side of her and i squish her cheeks (giving her the pucker face) and squeeze the meds in her mouth.. she can’t spit it back out and she has to swallow.. it works every time!

By: Nicole Campbell

Nicole Campbell — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 16:45:54 +0000

There is a exsersaucer in the background of the pic of Maddy playing with th jewlry boxes…It has been recalled. I have the same one. One of the end caps falls off when you transition it into the 3rd stage. If she leans on the end cap it will fall off and she will fall down to and may get hurt…Call 800-233-5921 for a replacement cap…I seen it in a parenting magazine this month (April). Personaly I just put mine away because when I set it up in stage 3 it was flimsy and pretty much sucked.

By: Stacy

Stacy — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 18:11:10 +0000

Matt, I found your blog yesterday off of another friends blog. I can’t stop reading. Maddy is absolutely gorgeous, just like Liz. The truthfulness of your words have painted such an honest picture of your love for Liz, Maddy and your heartache. Thank you. I am certain that Liz is smiling her gorgeous smile seeing that Maddy has the best dad she could have ever have hoped her to have. You are handling such a fucked up raw deal with unbelievable grace. It’s truly inspiring.

I’ve got a 5 year old and an 18 month old. Just a quick tip for medicine since I’ve had to play twister myself trying to administer. Squirt it into the side of her cheek and if you blow on her face hard, she’ll swallow. She’ll still get “medicine pissed” after, but it’ll get it down. You are doing a fabulous job!

Happy birthday to your beautiful girl! I hope you’re both feeling healthy and the daycare snot monsters aren’t passing any more germs!

By: Holly

Holly — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 01:45:02 +0000

Ok I haven’t read all the posts and seriously when the hell do you get to? lol. Anyways, just incase you read this I have a small tip. I have found it very easy to give my kids medicine by adding it to their bottle of formula or sippy with juice or something else to take away from the taste. As for the $2 flavor from Target…yeah CVS charges $2 as well… very aggravating! By the way, glad to see Joshua Tree hasn’t changed since I was there about 10 or so years ago

Happy Birthday to Madeline and hugs to you because I feel you are going through pure hell but at the same time happiness for Madeline. It can’t be easy but try to smile through the tears.

By: Rosie Parket

Rosie Parket — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 18:00:30 +0000

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MADDY!!! Thinking of you and your family. Enjoy your day. Mommy is watching.

Rosie (in the San Jose)

By: Crash Course Widow

Crash Course Widow — Sat, 21 Mar 2009 08:32:38 +0000

You know, I’ve often wondered why I’d castrate myself so completely, flay myself repeatedly remembering all that same awful, painful shit of all the “lasts” before Charley died. The last time we had sex, the last mini-argument we had, the last laugh we had, the last phone call we had (about 2 hours before he died) where he seemed a little crabby or short with me (or, at a minimum, impatient that I was eating into his last few minutes of prep before leaving for the race). The list always goes on and on…and I still do it 3 1/2 years later, although not as frequently and not out of a desire to invite more pain onto myself. Sometimes it’s just to happily reminisce, or else just to remember things that weren’t good at the time but that were still way fucking better than what life turned into after he died.

Sometimes I think I (we?) do it to still try to hold onto our dead spouses, to still grasp onto whatever thread we can, no matter how temporary or painful. Because no matter what, they were here when that shit happened, and the pain of remembering the now-vs.-then tightrope still hurts less than the actual knowledge that they’re dead and never, ever coming back. Maybe it’s a little like people who cut themselves: a physical pain is easier to bear than a cosmic pain. The pain of old memories is still painful and hard, but it’s not as hard as the unfathomable pain on that cosmic level.

Or maybe I’m totally full of it. And I also think there isn’t a whole lot of controlling those thoughts when they happen. They’re not anything we can stop, so how can they be something that we consciously choose to think about. They’re thoughts that happen to us, not that we initiate.

Hang in there this coming week. And I imagine you’re right–I wouldn’t be surprised at all if the actual anniversary isn’t as bad as the dread/anticipation. But then again, I can’t honestly say (or remember) if the anticipation or the reality of that first death anniv. was the worst. In the end, I think it was the weeks after it–and then the years after it–that were worse than the actual first anniversary. But if nothing else, I can vouch that that first anniversary is the worst. The others haven’t been nearly as bad.

Hugs. And happy birthday a few days early to Maddy!! Have a fabulous time in Mexico, as much as possible.

By: Amanda

Amanda — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 17:29:22 +0000

I got tired of the medicine struggle…we skip the medicine at home and just ask for a shot at the Dr.’s office. Granted it’s a shot but it’s over and done and we can forget about it…

By: nicole

nicole — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 15:55:19 +0000

wow. talk about a smack in the face. my husband and i often grumble and complain, arguing about whose turn is to do x y or z with our 3 boys. especially with our 9 month old…who changed the last poopy diaper, who got up with him the night before etc. thanks for helping me realize how stupid we are…..you’re doing this all on your own, and i know you aren’t complaining, and that you’d do anything in the world for maddy….but it’s hard. i can only imagine how hard it is to do it on your own, and not just caring for maddy but also dealing with the grief of losing liz at the same time. thanks for sharing…